RK Interviews
by shura-chan27
Summary: This is a story where the actors who play the characters of RK get interviewed. MAJOR OOC! PG for some language. this is my first ficcie so bear with me.REVIEW PLEASE!
1. Kenshin's Interview

Hi there everyone. This is my first ficcie soo please be nice. Reviews please!! I WANT REVIEWS!!! If you have read this story review!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't really care what u say about the fiction I just want some reviews please!!!!!!!! ^_^ oh yeah if I owned RK kaoru would've been pregnant before she got captured by Jineh was over. Oh yeah I also don't own pepsi.But I do own bob!!

Chapter 1: Kenshin's Interview

Bob: Hellooooooo everyone this is Bob(A/N: I need a name ok!) reporting live for RKTV!(eccentric fangirls like me cheer in audience)

Bob: today we have one special show for you all today!

Fangirls: yay!!!!!!!!!

Bob: We are interviewing the cast of rurouni kenshin today!!!

Fangirl 1: I WANT KENSHIN CAN HE SAY ORO FOR ME IT IS SOOOOOOOOO SEXY WHEN HE DOES THAT!!!AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON HIM AND LAUNDRY!!!!

Fangirl 2: NO WAY!!! HE ONLY SAYS ORO FOR ME GOT IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fangirl 3: KENNY IS MY MAN !!!!!!!!!! NEITHER OF YOU SHITHEADS ARE GETTING HIM!!!!!!HE IS MINE !!!!!!!MWUHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!(big fight erupts from every fangirl in audience. Secruity Guards are trying to calm down the rabid fangirls.)

Bob: *sweatdrops* ummmmmmmmmm maybe we should bring out the actor who plays Kenshin on RK to interview him? 

All fangirls: *instantly stop and return to seats*

Bob: okay.. well here he is!!!!!!!!!! ( a man with black hair, a buzz cut, and amber eyes comes onstage and sits on the chair next to Bob)

Bob: Uhhhh…. Sorry I think you have the wrong chair.

Freaky Man: I don't think so. This is the chair that the actor who plays Kenshin sits in when he is supposed to be interviewed right? And if it isn't you better tell me where it is or I will Hiten Mitsurugi your ass to hell and back.

Fangirl 1: ITS KENSHIN!!!!!!!!!!! I WOULD RECOGNISE HIS DEAD SEXY VOICE ANYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All fangirls: KEENNSSSHHHIIINNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fangirl 2: WAIT!!!!!!!!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT INCERDIBLY LONG HAIR 

AND THOSE SEXY VIOLET EYES!!!???!!!???!!!

All fangirls: (stop cheering)

Bob: ummmmmmmm… I am not sure fangirls lets ask him.  Kenshin, what happened to your hair??

Kenshin: what hair?

Bob: that ridiculously long red hair that those fangirls apparently thought were really sexy??

Kenshin: Ohhh. Did you think that was real hair?

Bob: You mean it was a wig!!!!!!!!!!?????????????!!!!!!!!!!

Kenshin: yeah duh. I mean what idiot would REALLY wear their hair that long ?

Bob: Ummm……… well what happened to your eyes??? 

Kenshin: you mean the purple contacts I had to wear?

Bob: Purple contacts!!

Kenshin: Yeah. Only they fell out the first time I was Battousai on the set and nobody really noticed.

Bob: Ohhh….

Fangirl 1: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! I WANT KENNY TO HAVE HIS EYES AND HAIR BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!( chucks a kenshin plushie doll at him)

Kenshin: ( plushie doll hits him in the head) Oro!!!!!!!!

Fangirls: YAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!HE SAID ORO!!

Kenshin: why did I say oro? Oh yeah! I practiced a lot saying that so when I had to say it I would sound more realistic.

Fangirl 2: (chucks a can of pepsi at Kenshin)

Kenshin: ORO!

Fangirls: ( all start chucking objects at Kenshin)

Kenshin: OROOROOROOROOROORO!!!!!!!!!!!

Fangirls: ( running out of objects to chuck at him so they start throwing shoes and chairs at him.)

Kenshin: OOORRRRRRRRROOOOOOOO!!!!!!!STOOOOOOOOPP!!!!!!!!

Fangirls: ( instantly stop for they are so dedicated to Kenshin and obey his every command)

Kenshin: (gives one of those Battousai glares to audience and talks in a scary voice) If ANYONE throws one more thing at me I will take matters into my own hands. 

Fangirls: ( all nod)

Kenshin: Good.

Bob: ummmmmmmmmm.. now where were we??

Fangirl 4: ( just entered studio because she was in the bathroom while all the commotion was happening) Who is that freaky guy sitting where kenshin is supposed to be??

Fangirl 3:That is-

Fangirl 4:IMPOSTER!!!!!!!! YOU ARE NOT MY SEXY BEAST KENSHIN!!!!!!!! (chucks shoe at Kenshin before anyone can stop her)

Kenshin:  THAT'S IT!!!!!!!!!!! SECURITY!!!!!!!CODE 55098!!!!!!(A/N: I have no idea what 55098 means. I just typed in numbers ^_^x)

Two security guards dressed like SWAT team members come on the set an place a huge net between the audience of rabid fangirls and Kenshin and Bob.

Fangirl 2: Darn. I wanted him to turn all Battousai on us. He looks sooooooooo hot when fighting.

Bob:  So Kenshin what do you like being an actor for Rurouni Kenshin?

Kenshin: I don't like anything. It doesn't pay enough. That is why I have a meeting with my agent and the crew to discuss payment issues.

Bob: ummm ok.

Kenshin: ( answers ringing cell phone) Talk to me. WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOO!!! I NEEEED MY BEST SUIT FOR TONIGHTS MEETING!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN THE DRY CLEANERS WENT OUT OF BUISINESS! NO YOU CANNOT GO TO A DIFFERENT ONE!!!THAT ONE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDN'T USE TOO MUCH STARCH!!!! 

Bob: Ummm lets go to commercials.

Announcer Voice: Are you tired of your one and only true love ignoring you? Do you feel like whatever you do you still cannot get his attention? Then you need Misao's Guide To Getting Your Guy! 

Female Voice: Every day I tried to capture the attention of my love, but I could never do it. Then I heard about Misao's Guide To Getting Your Guy. Once I followed her advice, and saw her success with Aoshi, I had my man nearly on his knees begging for my attention!

Announcer Voice: Misao's Guide To Getting Your Guy includes three videotapes and one brochure. If you call within the next 15 minutes, we will send you a free Misao's Guide to Braiding Hair and Other Ravishing Hairdoos. Remember! This is a limited time offer so hurry up and call 1-800-GET-GUY now!

Kenshin: (still yelling at agent) FINE!!!!!!! GO DO MY DRY CLEANING SOMEWHERE ELSE YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!! I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU SAY BUT IT WILL STILL BE TOO STARCHY OR NOT STARCHY ENOUGH!!!!!! DID YOU DO MY REGULAR CLEANING AT THE LAUNDRY PLACE!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!! NO I WANT IT DONE BY TODAY!! NO I WONT DO IT MYSELF!!!!!!!!!! I HATE THE STUPID LAUNDRY!!!!!!! (breaks phone in half.)

Bob: Ummm… so I see that you still have your crossed scar. I'm guessing it's not makup.  Is it?

Fangirl 1: YAY!!!!!!!! HE HAS HIS SEXY SCAR!!!!!!!!!!!

Fangirls: YAY!!!!!!!!!! 

Kenshin: No, this is a real scar. Actually it is two scars. I got the first one when my mother was exercising on her StairMaster and… I got too close.

Bob: ohhhhhh..what about the other one?

Kenshin: I ran into the kitchen counter.

Bob: oh. 

Bob: Anyway we are almost done with you kenshin.

Kenshin: THANK GOD!!!! 

Bob: Are you currently seeing anyone on the cast of RK?

Kenshin: You mean like dating?

Bob: yeah.

Kenshin: No. I am not interested in sharing the money I make with other people.

Bob: oh.. (turns to audience of fangirls) well anyway! We will be back with more interviews after this break!!

well did you like it???? Pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaasseeeeeee say you did. And even if you didn't review anyway. My goal is 10 reviews and that's it. I really don't think a crappy story like this will get very many. Anyway I promise that the next chapter will be Kaoru. I hope you people liked it. I also hope you laughed. MAKE ME HAPPY AND GET AT LEAST 10 REVIEWS!!! I HAVE SEEN STORIES WITH OVER 600 !!( Lady himura's story)Anyway…. Chow for now. 


	2. Kaoru's Interview

Hello people I am back!!!! I probably have no more readers left from the last chapter because they all ran away at the absolute insanity of it .oh yeah, if you do run away, at least REVIEW PLEEZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway I hope all you readers enjoy this one and think it is kinda funny. Oh btw I don't own RK cause if I did, I don't think that there would've been an Enishi. Oh, but I do own bob.

Bob:*gulp*

Me: MWUHAHAHAHAH!!!!! NOW THAT I OWN YOU, YOU CAN BE MY SLAVE!!!!

Bob: but im a reporter!

Me: I DON'T CARE NOW GO CLEAN MY ROOM!!MWUHAHAH!!!

Bob: Hello everyone! Our break is over and we are now at Kaoru's dressing room!

Fangirl 1: WHAT DOES SHE HAVE THAT I DON'T HAVE!! WHY DON'T I ATTRACT THAT SEXY RUROUNI!!!!!!!!!!!

Bob: *sweatdrops* Uhh anyway lets go inside now shall we?(opens door)

The room he opens up is filled with weapons. Every single wall in the room has shelves and shelves of guns, swords and other weapons including Misao's kunai and Aoshi's kodachi. Kaoru is sitting inside on a swivel chair with her hair down and wearing a very revealing outfit. (It looks very similar to Christina Agularia's last outfit that she wore to the 2003 VMA's. If you need a better explanation, it is basically a mini mini skirt and a mini mini top, all black of course, and black fishnet material connecting everything.)

Bob: Uhh Kaoru?

Kaoru: (turns around in chair) Why, hello Bob!

Bob: Umm you look a lot different than what I expected.(sits down on a couch)

Kaoru: Oh really? (sits down very close to Bob with her arms on his shoulders)

Bob: Yeah… Umm I see you have a lot of weapons here.  
  


Kaoru: Yes collecting them is my hobby.

Bob: Oh. 

Kaoru: Collecting weapons is not the only thing I do well( wraps arms more securely around Bob and rests head in the crook of his neck)

Fangirl 2: SEE SEE!!!!!! LOOK AT HER!!!!!!!!! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU DON'T HAVE FANGIRL 1!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bob: ( jumps up out of couch) Umm did you provide any of the weapons for Rurouni Kenshin?

Kaoru: Yes, as a matter of fact I provided all the weapons. 

Bob: Even Kenshin's sakabatou?

Fangirl 3: I LOVE HOW KENSHIN DOESN'T KILL PEOPLE WITH HIS SWORD!!!! I T IS JUST SOOOOOOOO SWEET AND CARING!!!!!

Kaoru: YEAH RIGHT!! CARING MY ASS!!!!! KENSHIN IS WEAK AND THE STUPID SWORD JUST MAKES HIM WEAKER CAUSE HE CANT KILL WITH IT !! DON'T YOU GET IT YOU BITCH!!

Fangirl 3: WHAT ABOUT THE KAMIYA KASHIN RYU!! YOU KNOW, THE WHOLE NO KILLING THING!!

Kaoru: KILLING IS A SIGN OF STRENGTH!!!!!!!

Bob: STOP!!!!!!!!!(everyone stops yelling)

Kaoru: *flirty giggle* Oh how I love a man who takes charge in a situation! Ohohohoho!

Bob: uhhh, so you provided the sakabatou?

Kaoru: Yeah it is over there next to the bokkens.

Bob looks over to the corner of the room where there are a few dusty bokkens and a sakabatou which doesn't look like it has been touched in years.

Bob: Did you even own the swords that got broken during the series?

Kaoru's left eye starts twitching uncontrollably.

Kaoru: Yes… those *twitch*… were *twitch twitch* …mine …those …bastards *twitch* …said… all…*twitchity twitch* my… swords… would *twitch twitch* come… back… unharmed *twitchtwitchtwichtwitch*

Bob: (not noticing twitching) In the show the sword that Soujirou (A/N:spelling?) wrecked was really rare. Is that true?

Kaoru: Yes *twitch*… it was *twitch* priceless*twitchtwitch*

Bob: So how did you feel when you realized that they were irreplaceable.

Kaoru: (Eye stops twitching and walks over to a big gun) I felt like… Killing them(picks up gun) LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!MWUHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bob: AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! COMMMERCIALS!!!!!!!!!!PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Announcer Voice: Need a job that pays well? Are you strong and a good fighter, but your talents are not needed? Do you like boats? Then come and get a job with Shura's Pirate Crew!!!!! You can be on boats all day long! You can even help battle other pirates and reckless people who think they are strong enough to battle you! There are only a few simple requirements! Just respect women, especially ones who can beat you up, DON'T DESCRIBE SHURA, AND ONLY THE CAPTIAN (SHURA) CAN REMOVE THEIR MASK!!!!!!!!! We will not be doing anything illegal at all, such as feeding banned drugs to people, and overthrowing our captian. I REPEAT WE ARE NOT GOING TO OVERTHROW OUR CAPTIAN AND THEN DECIDE TO THROW HER INTO A BIG FIRE, OKAY!!!!!!!!!! Anyway, if you are interested at all, please call our toll free number: 1-800- PIRATES, and we will give you an application to fill out. Again the number is 1 800 PIRATES.

Bob is now hiding behind a pillow. Kaoru has dropped the big machine gun, and there are about a bazillion holes in the wall.

Kaoru: OMIGOSH!!! Im sooooooooooooo sorry Bob!!!!!!!! You know I would never EVER do anything to hurt you on purpose!!!

Bob: (peeks out from behind the pillow)Okay… do you still want to continue the interview?

Kaoru: (jumps onto couch next to Bob) Only if it means  being with you!

Bob: ummm….uh…..well…..

Kaoru: Yes?(moves closer to Bob)

Bob: Uhhhh… What do you like about being a star on Rurouni Kenshin?

Kaoru: Beating up Kenshin, Sano and Yahiko of course.

Bob: Umm… I guess this is the last question…but are you having any…relationships with any of the stars of Rurouni Kenshin?

Kaoru: (crawls into Bob's lap) No…I 'm single.

Bob: Uhhh.. I have to go!(jumps out of couch sending Kaoru tumbling onto the floor) 

Bob makes a quick getaway and slams the door to Kaoru's dressing room)

Bob: We'll be back with more interviews in a little while!!!

How did you like Kaoru's chappie?? Well I can't decide who to do next for the next interview. It is either between Soujirou, Sano, or Misao and Megumi(They will be in a chapter together). Oh yeah… REVIEW!!!!!!!!!! I ONLY GOT 1 REVIEW!!!!!! I WANT 9 MORE AT LEAST!!!!!! PLEASE BE NICE THIS IS MY FIRST FICCIE!!!!!!!!! And now for my special reviewer(notice how it is not plural):

leiko47seta: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!! FINALLY SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS ME!! ALL HAIL YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

If you would also like to be worshiped by me, click that nice button down there that says submit review! IT WILL NOT HURT U!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


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